I cant control myself. What if you can see my darker side? I cant escape myself. I lie, i cry.
People come and go. And we have to face that some are not going to stay forever. They might get bored, get sick, find another path in life then the one you both used to be walking on. And everyone has a darker side, a darker side that tells you to leave the ones you love alone, because you dont want them to get hurt because of you. Well, thats not really a darker side because your intentions are good. But still. So like i said, we have this darker side, we just dont always reveal it, its supposed to be locked away. Were supposed to be good persons, right? Well, we all know that thats quite impossible. Theres always a bad guy in every story, sometimes its just hard to find. Some say that they have found a way. Others appear to never be able to find that one way. The way you go isnt always the way you wanted to go, but you have to take a path in the end and keep following it, whether its the right one or not. We were all supposed to live here, God must've wanted us to. But its not like God is that almighty, even He does not know everything about everything, a sulution to every problem. And we need this holdon in our lives. They say bad things happen to good people, but deep inside, theres a little evilin all of us. Sure. All those things are what make us who we are today. Your personality depends on your surroundings, your mates, family...
Some just need to open their eyes, and see whats right in front of them instead of searching over the hills, trying to find a better place, their one true love, something with more value then what they have now. But thruth is, what you need, is with you, and if youre so damn convinced that its not,THEN you can go search for it. But not too far. I believe that theres someone for everyone. Everything might seem so picture perfect when youre in love... but its not. And you to stand tall and get out of that fudging pretty pink cloud. Ive learned that none of your beloved ones stay forever. Some of them even leave very soon. Though i believe that apologies are for the weak. And dont regret what you did, just make sure it doesnt happen again the next time. Ive been true some big shit lately. But i find my way out over and over again. On my own. I dont really need anyone. I know a lot of people say that when theyre angry/depressed etc...
But that has been my opinion since forever. I can perfectly be fine on my own. Of course its nice to know that someone loves you a lot. But ah, like i said, ive learned that they always leave.
Okey, let's move on now... So am i THAT boring ? Or maybe its just my personality. Funny thing is, they leave. But then later on the month/year,they come crawling back. Im like... "will you make up your mind, PLEASE ?". I dont like feeling pushed around, i dont think anyone likes that. Thats why im always straight edge to everyone. I say whats on my mind, and if you think its rude or such, well, thats me? Theres not really a point to this story. I just love writing. Writing away my feelings, my thoughts while some of the amazing music of my playlist is playing on the background. Im not going to lie, im not happy. I never have been, i just make myself believe that i am. I smile, i laugh. And it all looks like i mean it so fudging much. I wouldnt ever care if i got ran over by a car tomorrow. I noticed that i have changed. Some people dont like the New Andy at all. Well, shes here, whether you like it or not ? :l They're like "OMG Andy, you cant go, id miss you so much !!" Im like... "Ohh PLEASE,Im just some internet girl you know. Its not like were ever going to meet in real or whatever." Its easy to forget, so please do. Im not mean, im sober. Literally and Figurely. Ive never even touched a cigarette, never been high, never had sex. Doesnt mean im a loser. USE CONDOMS KIDS! Lmao. I'm so not grownup. I totally got of subject. This story still has no meaning/point at all. ~ Hope you die. Goodbye. (: